Friday, June 17, 2016

A story of Ramadhan

Yesterday, my group had a bed-site teaching and it was my turn to present a case. I came early that morning and Alhamdulillah, I finally managed to clerk a thyroid case. The patient was a very nice and cooperative Chinese lady. After presenting my case, it was the time for physical examination.

Since the patient came with a neck swelling, I needed to perform a physical examination that need to rule out the causes of all neck swelling thus include thyroid. In thyroid examination, one of the tests that we need to perform is whether the swelling moves with swallowing or not. It was a simple test. What we need to do is ask the patient to drink a sip of water, hold it and the moment you ask the patient to swallow, you need to watch whether the swelling moves or not. Usually in thyroid case, it will move with swallowing.

Hence, I asked the patient to do the same. But what touched my heart was that she did appologize that she had to drink in front of us since it was Ramadhan. We said that it was fine but it really touched me because she really respected us who was fasting and even asked the permission from us to drink. On top of that, when I was writing my case on the cardiac table in front of her bed, she even went outside to eat her breakfast. I was very suprised. 

I didn't expect her to do that. I mean, well the patient was sick and it was okay if she wanted to eat in front of me. I really didn't mind that. But she did something that really touched me. 

Dear madam, I knew that you won't read this but I prayed for health and speedy recovery from your operation. God bless you :)

without wax,
haniyahaya :)

Wednesday, June 8, 2016

Of incision and drainage

So today I decided to spend my evening at the procedure room in Emergency Department (ED) since I had no classes in the evening. 

Frankly speaking, I loved to spend my time there because there were a lot of hands-on procedures that I could observe, assist and perform. Maybe that's why I wanted to become an ED Physician one day, insyaAllah. 

Back to story. I was in the procedure room today and a lady came in with right gluteal abscess. After took the history, did physical exam and  being assessed by the doctor, the patient needed to go to the Incision & Drainage (I&D) procedure for her problem. So there was the medical assistant (MA) and me. Since the MA was a gentleman, I had to be there to be his chaperone and of course, to assist him a little bit here and there. 

Upon further questioning with her, she claimed that she had suffered from the abscess for almost a week. The moment when the swelling was incised, there was yellowish pus coming out with foul-smelling discharge. The amount was approximately 50-80ml (Ah, I was so bad at this!). The smell was so bad like a corpse and we (the MA and I) almost puked ourselves. We even felt so dizzy after the procedure ended. Gosh, it was horrendously disturbing. 

I'm not saying anything bad about the patient. Well, you didn't know how much she had suffered from it. But the thing is, it reminds me of how we are going to be like when we are dead. 

Yes, we are all going to die; no one exceptional. I wonder how we are going to be like when we are died. Are we going to be like a rotten, decaying corpse like nobody's going to concern about you? Or are we going to be the one who will be remembered by all and people will pray for you? 

Let's just think back and reflect ourselves. 

What are we living for? 
Have you satisfy enough with your life right now? 

without wax,
haniyahaya :)

P/s: Even after came back home, the smell was still haunting me. Oh dear! >.<

Monday, June 6, 2016


Ever since I was a teenager, I always thought that crying is only for weaklings. Boy, I was so wrong!

Well, I don't know why I think that way. I've always wanted to be seen as a strong person, hence this cry thingy is totally not for me and out of my league. 

But hey, who think that way? I once read that when you cry, half of your burden will be vanished away. It elevates your mood and lowers down your stress level.It lets the devils out. That is how powerful cry is. 

On top of that, I hate if people see me crying. Of course it is embarassing but I just don't like if people see my weakness.  Get what I mean?  

But today, something happened. I cried today. I didn't how it happen but I just did. I never thought that I would be burst into tears but I just couldn't hold it back. And guess what? I'd became more relaxed right now. (Plus with the fruitful advices and kind words and also a warm hug!) 

Yeah, last weekend was such a tumultuous ride for me. I felt like I was lost. My whole life was dark. So did my mind, heart and soul. I felt empty. 

Alhamdulillah, Allah did answer my prayers and I was very grateful for that. I hoped that this sorrow and misery would go away. Be gone and never come back.

"All these feelings need to be felt. 
We need to stomp and storm;
 to sob and cry; 
to perspire and tremble.”

without wax, 
haniyahaya :)

Saturday, June 4, 2016

Will I survive without ...

Today, I decided to take a break off from the social media. I decided to deactivate my Twitter account which I think the biggest distraction ever in my life. I initially wanted to deactivate my Instagram account too but I decided to keep it away. I even delete the Youtube application in my iPhone too (so that I won't be wasting much time there. You should know how much I spent my time in Youtube!)
The reason why I needed to take a break off was plain and simple. I needed to limit the time that I spent in social media. For those out there who might knew me, I was the worst person when it comes to social media. I could spend hours and hours at there. Well, you can say that I was a hardcore social media users. 

So with Twitter was off the limit, I wished that I could write more in this blog. Well, not many people really read my blog anyway, so I guessed it was better this way. Plus, I've been abandoned this blog and I kinda missed writing. Writing is my passion. 

Wish me luck guys! I hope I could survive! 

without wax, 
haniyahaya :)


Sometimes you need to fall down so that it will make you stronger.

I need to pull up my strength to fight this battle.

Maybe it is a sign for me to become closer to Him.

It is a sign for me that sometimes you need to look down.

It is a sign for me that life is not always bed of roses.

Hopefully I can grow stronger.

There's not much time left.